S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y Night

Everyone’s doing something and
I’m just trying to get out of bed.
At least the pizza is good and
the AC still works. I just want my
pants to fit and for him to go to
the bathroom when I want him to.

This is all too much to ask for and
none of this matters, never matters,
won’t ever.

It’s called romantic irony and I’m
just your run of the mill asshole.
I’m trying to stop, trying to make
things better, but like I said, once
the pants fit, I’ll be a better person.